Not even a mile-marker.

I satisfy myself with putting the complete RENT soundtrack on in the background and acknowledging that I am far from being over it. I satisfy myself by admitting that I'm avoiding, and that it still hurts. I remember my father, and am sure that this too shall pass.

I'm making life work here, and that's the important part. It's such a tough pill to swallow each time.

We sit alone together in our room, each immersed in books and web-searching, each surrounded by the bubble we create with headphones and a glowing computer screen. It's proof that, even together, solidary serenity is possible.

There are moments when I am so angy. So, so angry at what got taken -- at what I worry I can never, ever get back. But that never stays long, it's not something to be angry about, it's not something that was done rather something that happened, and it didn't happen to me exclusively. It would be just as productive as being mad at time.

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